The Best Searches You’ll Ever See In June

The Mabo Media Search Term Query Report Blog for June by Matthew Soakell

Seriously, this is probably the best ever month for submissions of cool and quirky search terms. I’m going to put it out there and say it might never be topped. So while Google has recently being going through a rebrand and launched a whole load of new products and features at Google Marketing Live, we’ll take you through some of the best searches from last month; hopefully you’ll find them as entertaining as we did.

Remember when you parents would tell you that money doesn’t grow on trees? Well it would appear that this person either wasn’t told by their parents that this was the case, or maybe they thought their parents were lying to them. Mine lied to me about being their favourite child. I have no siblings, which makes it worse. Moving swiftly on…

(Account industry – Furniture)

On to a much darker search term next. That’s right, you read that correctly, “human legs for sale”. Extremely intriguing, but dark nonetheless. Probably a black market kinda purchase that one, not that I’d know where to start.

(Account industry – Health care – lol!)

A couple of ‘how to’ themed searches for you now, both of which are pretty stupid. Maybe that’s too harsh; I’ll let you be the judge of that. This one could be a first-time uni student who’s never had to wash their clothes before, but even so, don’t ask Google that!

(Account industry – Electronics)

I can forgive this person for Googling “how to kill the grass in my yard” much more than I can someone searching how to wash their clothes, but even then, it can’t be that hard?

(Account industry – Home improvement)

Where to start? It doesn’t even make sense… do they want a buggy for their child who’s a bit of a bugger?

(Account industry – childcare)

Ask your boss, not Google!

(Account industry – Removals)

I guess as long as you’re only using this on yourself and therefore no animals are going to be harmed with the use of said cut-throat razor, then I guess it’s fine…

(Account industry – Grooming)

Maybe this search was by the same person who was wanting to buy human legs? Once again, I think the black market is the best option here. Can you imagine the thought process? “I need some dodgy money… I know, I’ll ask the biggest search engine in the world – you know, the one that tracks my search history, knows my IP address and makes that information available to my internet provider?” Weird.

(Account industry – Finance)

You’d be forgiven for initially thinking this search read ‘I need a baby gate lock’ or something similar, but no, read it again. “I need to lock a baby gate” – how hard can it be?

(Account industry – Security)

Penultimately, a pleasant and plucky search term from Kim Jong-un, who’s after something special for his eight year old daughter. Yes he has an eight year old daughter – as of June 2018 anyway. Whether this is a search by Kim Jong-un, Kim Kardashian or your aunty Kim who’s always liking your Facebook posts, it’s a bit disturbing!

(Account industry – Thermal imaging)

We finish June’s STQR blog off with what really is a question for your local council. Actually, surely it’s just common sense to know that you don’t take your bins with you? Some people stick stickers on their bins, so how would that work if you moved house and went from being number 151 to number 4? Leave it where you found it, mate.

(Account industry – Removals)

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